“Intentional help is better because it means you’re making a choice to care about people beyond your own family.”
As Emily prepared for bed that night, she asked the question that had been building throughout our conversation about Robert’s broader criminal activities.
“Grandma Cathy, do you think there are other kids like me who notice things about their grandpas or dads hiding money?”
“Probably. Why?”
“Because if there are other kids who saw bad things but didn’t know they were important, maybe we should teach them what to look for and who to tell.”
I looked at my nine-year-old granddaughter, who was proposing to expand our foundation’s mission to include education for children about recognizing and reporting family financial fraud.
“Emily, that’s a wonderful idea. What would you want to teach other children?”
“That adults who tell kids to keep secrets from other adults are usually doing something wrong. That when grandmas or moms seem sad and confused about money, kids should pay attention to why. And that telling the truth about what you see and hear can protect people you love.”
Some nine-year-olds, I was learning, had more sophisticated understanding of prevention and systemic change than most adults achieved in decades of professional experience. Some foundations could grow beyond their original missions when the people running them recognized that individual justice was only meaningful if it led to protection for everyone facing similar threats. And some granddaughters could transform personal trauma into public education with the moral clarity that came from understanding that love required courage, truth required risk, and protection required refusing to let harmful adults operate in secrecy and assume no one was watching.
Tomorrow, Emily and I would begin developing educational programs to teach children across the country how to recognize and report family financial fraud. Tonight, I would be grateful for the granddaughter who taught me that some battles were worth fighting, not just for personal victory, but for the protection of people whose names we’d never know but whose lives could be saved by refusing to let criminals operate without consequence.
Three years after Robert’s conviction and sentencing to 18 years in federal prison, I stood in the auditorium of the Memphis Convention Center, looking out at an audience of 500 women and children who’d gathered for the Katherine Gillian Foundation’s third annual conference on family financial protection. Emily, now 12 and poised beyond her years, was preparing to deliver the keynote address that would officially launch our Children as Financial Guardians Education Program, a curriculum designed to teach kids nationwide how to recognize and report family financial fraud.
“Grandma Kathy,” Emily said, adjusting the microphone at the podium. “Are you ready to hear about everything we’ve accomplished?”
I nodded from my seat in the front row, surrounded by foundation staff, volunteer attorneys, and women whose lives had been transformed by the resources Emily’s courage had made possible.
“Good afternoon, everyone. Three years ago, I was nine years old and my grandfather was stealing money from my grandmother while planning to leave her with nothing. Today, I’m 12 years old and our foundation has helped 847 women recover over $63 million in hidden assets.”
The audience applauded, but Emily continued with the matter-of-fact delivery that had characterized her approach to important presentations since her first court testimony.
“But the number I’m most proud of is this one. Three hundred twelve children have provided testimony that helped protect their families from financial fraud. That means 312 kids learned that paying attention and telling the truth can save people they love.”
“When I first testified about my grandfather’s secret meetings and conversations about hiding money, I thought I was just helping my grandmother. But what I learned is that when you stand up to one bad person, you help protect everyone from all the bad people doing the same things.”
Emily paused, looking out at an audience that included children ranging from seven to sixteen, all of whom had participated in documenting family financial deception.
“I want to tell you about some of the kids who became financial guardians for their families. Ten-year-old Marcus noticed that his dad was getting mail sent to fake addresses and asking questions about his mom’s retirement accounts. Fourteen-year-old Sarah recorded conversations where her stepdad talked about moving money to other countries before their divorce was finalized. Eight-year-old David saw his grandfather giving jewelry and expensive gifts to a woman who wasn’t his grandmother. All of these kids learned the same thing I learned. Adults who tell children to keep secrets from other adults they love are usually doing something wrong. And when you love someone, you don’t let other people hurt them just because those people are adults or family members.”
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